Conviction carries...

Writing is something I have always been passionate about, even from my earliest days. I used to write stories and share them with my mom, who praised my work, though to look back now it was probably shameful. I'm sure back then the stories consisted of princesses and dragons, or ninja's and sonic the hedge hog, thanks to my brother's influence.
Books, writing, poetry, simple notes, they've all impacted my life over the past 21 years because for some reason they speak to me in a way other things can't.

So, of course, tonight as I sit in Starbucks talking with one of my best friends, she would use my love of writing against me, only to convict me of how insignificant I am compared to the great God we serve.

Life is like a book, God of course is the author, and we are the characters. We each have our own different roles and paths of life and God, just like a writer, knows the outcome. As my dearest Kelsey said, "The characters don't get to look at the writer and say, 'you're writing this wrong' or 'I think I'd rather have that character's plot line instead.'"
The interesting thing is, whenever I'm writing a story, I always try to take great care in my characters. I want them to be dynamic characters who have meaning and purpose and I connect them with other characters for different reasons because it serves the overall purpose of the story line.
In comparison to my mediocre writing skills, at best, I can only conclude that God, being the author and perfecter of our faith, would be able to write out the best story of all. Life.
He seems to have it under control, starting off with a beginning; creation, and of course working out the details in between and even having the ending all figured out. It's almost like he thought everything through or something (please note the sarcasm).

Why is it, that as humans, we aren't satisfied with the Author or the story? Are we so selfish to think that we could write a better story for our lives?
Are we so stupid to think that our story isn't good enough? We take what we've been given for granted and instead of being thankful for what we have, we waste our time wishing for things we don't.
The beauty of it is, we don't need to waste our time trying to figure out why our story was written the way it was, or is, all we have to do is keep going. Put one foot in front of the other and continue on our journey.
I think, if more people viewed life as an adventure or journey rather than a mundane existence, life as we know it, would be much different.

I can far more understand why Christ said we should have a child-like faith, in retrospect, everything was easier to grasp because I wasn't searching for endless answers, I was more content because I decided to be. Children don't have it easy, life isn't always simple for kids, but often times they choose for it to be, just because they want to. Sometimes, I wonder, if that couldn't be such a bad idea for adults too.

Random thoughts at 11:30pm.
Always learning and growing. Thank God for tomorrows.

Signed,
gypsy girl

Colors

I've been walkin' down this road for quite a while now
Sifting through the good and the bad
I've been waiting for the world to make a change for the better
But then I realized the world was just so sad

And when the rain hit my window pane
And the stars started falling from the sky
I realized the sun will keep on shining
Because the dark is never dark inside the light

Oh, the colors burst open wide
When your heart and mine collide

Then one day while I was walking down my path
My legs gave way and I stumbled upon the ground
But when you picked me up I looked a little down
You said sorry but I'm stronger than you now

My world had changed from the sorry state I was in
Now I know I can't change the world I live
But when I feel like the end is chasing me down
I'll give you all I have and that's all I can give


Oh, the colors burst open wide
When your heart and mine collide
Oh, the ray of reality will shine
When I put into your hands what was not mine

Signed,
gypsy girl

On my mind

Today made me think of random things. For instance, it was sunny and nearly 60 degrees out today and it made me think of how poorly my body acclimates to the weather. Here I was expecting the same temperatures we've been having, so I dress accordingly and then I go outside only to realize that I have far too many layers on.
It's moments like those that at the end of the day, I hang onto. Those simple moments where nothing much else matters except for the fact that I dressed too warm for the day.
I cling to those moments because these days I have far more on my plate then I normally do.

I've been told quite a few times that I should become a nurse, or do something in the medical field, though I don't think I'd really like it. I admire those who have a passion for the medical field, it's very stressful, though I'm sure entertaining as well.
But, even though the medical field is not my calling in life, you try and find a 21 year old girl who can handle any disgusting, graphic medical thing thrown at her... we are few and far between!

So, how am I holding up? To be honest, I'm not sure. Probably prayer. No doubt, actually. There's no way I'm able to handle all of this on my own. Though, I wish I could stop relying on my own strength as much, that's always been a weak point for me.
My days begin and end with information overload, but luckily, I have a God-given brain that allows me to store and sort all of that information and pull it out at a moments notice for whatever may come.
I ramble because it's the easiest way to maintain sanity. If I could continually talk about the weather or how not clean my room is, I would. But, alas, the only thing that surrounds my mind these days is hospitals, doctors, decisions, helping, hoping and praying.
I didn't know things would turn out this way, when I was a kid the last thing on my list of "things to deal with when I got older" was so many medical issues. I thought my biggest problem would be picking out a car when I was 16. Ha! That's so laughable now. I guess I've come to appreciate the truly important things in life. Learned not to doddle in insignificant matters. Still.

I guess, at this point of my rambling, I would like to encourage anyone who had the patience to read this random post to really realize what's important today. To tell those you love that you love them. To spend more time showing you love people than telling them. To smile to random strangers because you never know if that one smile will brighten their whole day.
To enjoy life because it's shorter than you think. To trust God more than you trust yourself.

Yeah, and anything else that you deem as very important... do those things today, because you never know when today will be your last.

Signed,
gypsy girl